Tusc Shabbat: No Theme
:-)
-Joy Getnick
CSL Judaic Educator
When I look back over the past three years of dvarim there is always one dvar that sticks out as my absolute personal favorite. It was delivered during the fourth week of July 2010, and the theme was “signs,” not traffic signs, but rather places, people, and things that give our lives direction and meaning. The concept came from Moses’ continual reminder to the Israelites of the importance of the Sh’ma. In Jewish tradition, the Sh’ma is supposed to serve as a reminder of each of our individual connections to God, tradition, and community. Moses did not tell the Israelites to look for signs of God’s presence. Rather, Moses told the Israelites to create the signs, and to post them proudly on the doorposts of their homes and gates, and on the frontlets between their eyes. In this way, morning noon and night, inside the home or outside in the fields, the Israelites would always have little signs to remind them that although the world can be a lonely, overwhelming place, being an Israelite meant being part of something bigger, something special.
When I gave this dvar it had been a rough week. It was my first session of camp, and Jonathan, who at the time was my fiancé, wasn’t going to start working here until August, so for the most part I was alone. I had a couple of friends, and was becoming friendly with many people I now consider my friends, but as I think most new campers and staff can attest, the bonds people form here are very strong, and it can be hard to break in. It just takes time.
I spoke about how earlier that week I had found myself sitting outside my tent looking at the beautiful night sky, hoping I would see a friendly shadow in the dark. I sat outside my tent for a long time, but no person came. I started to wander around my tent and saw a spider spinning an intricate web. As I stood in the dark, I began to identify with the lone spider. He seemed ok in the dark, without a friend. In fact, he seemed quite happy in his new home. Content with my new bonding experience, I began to walk back to the front of my tent to go to bed. It was then that I saw that the spider wasn’t alone, but rather one of two spiders, weaving beautiful intricate webs together in the dark. I found myself jealous of the spiders, jealous of other critters I saw scampering around, always with a friend, never alone…like me.
As I lay on my bed, reading over the names written on my bedposts and on my tent ceilings, I began to feel comforted. I wondered about the friendships that had been made, or broken, in that tent, and about summers past. As I read the names over and over I began to feel less alone, and it was with that last thought that I fell fast asleep.
Traditionally the Shm’a is contained in a mezuzah, but my tent doesn’t have a mezuzah because it’s not a permanent dwelling. I realized that night that there weren’t always going to be signs posted on my doorpost. I realized that it was up to me to create new signs within my tent that would connect me with the larger community, provide comfort, and make me feel a little bit less alone.
To me, this message rings as true today as it did on that Shabbat over two years ago. I no longer feel alone at camp. Yet invariably I will someday find myself in another situation in which I feel equally alone. We all will. It’s just part of the ebb and flow of life. During those times of sadness I hope I remember that dvar. I hope I remember that while I can certainly spend my life wandering alone in the dark, I also have the power to pick myself up and create my own signs. I hope I remember that I have the power to give myself direction, and that even though I may feel alone at any given moment, in the end I’m part of something bigger, something special. Shabbat Shalom.
